


Hers and Hers and His

by my_mad_fatuation



Series: Three's Company, Too [2]
Category: My Mad Fat Diary
Genre: Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-28
Updated: 2017-02-28
Packaged: 2018-09-27 13:44:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,176
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10023425
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/my_mad_fatuation/pseuds/my_mad_fatuation
Summary: The girls have to make themselves scarce every time Finn brings home a lady-friend, which aggravates Rae.





	

“I’ll do all the dishes for a month,” Finn said desperately.

“Three months,” Rae replied, with arms akimbo.

“How about we compromise?” he added. “Two months?”

Rae exchanged glances with Chloe, who nodded back at her. “All right, two months.”

“This is in addition to you doing all the vacuuming for two months, as well,” said Chloe. “For last time we did you such a favour.”

“I know, and I appreciate it,” he said. “I just can’t have you two here when I bring a date home or she’ll think I’m some kind of philanderer.”

“But you are,” said Rae.

“She doesn’t need to know that, though!”

“Fine. We’ll be out of here by eight.”

Finn hugged her and started kissing her face all over. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

“That’s enough,” she said, pushing him away. “I get your point.”

“How come I don’t get any thanks?” said Chloe. “I’m getting kicked out of the flat, too, you know.”

“All right, then,” he said, and came at her with his arm open and his lips puckered, but she swatted him back.

“I don’t need you slobbering on me,” she said.

“Well, then, my sincerest thanks to both of you for vacating your home for a couple of hours so I can get some.” He bowed slightly.

The girls rolled their eyes and headed to their bedroom to get ready to go out for the evening.

“Sometimes I don’t believe him,” said Rae once they’d closed the door.

“What do you mean?” Chloe asked.

“He expects us to bend over backwards to let him bring dates back here all the time, but does he ever offer to disappear when one of us has a date? No.”

“You’ve had, like, one date since he moved in.”

“Not the point.”

“I’m sure if you asked him to leave, he’d be perfectly fine with it,” she said.

“Still, sometimes I want to spend Saturday night at home with a good book, you know?” said Rae. “But we get kicked out every week.”

“That’s because he’s more of a slut than you are.”

***

“You ever notice that the gay fella upstairs certainly has a lot of female friends?” the landlord said to his wife as he peered through the blinds of his front window.

“Are you spying on him, Stanley?” she replied without looking up from her magazine.

“Of course not!” he said. “You know I like looking out the window and just so happen to see things.”

“Whatever you say.”

“Well, I just so happen to see the gay fella—”

“Finn.”

“Right, Finn. I just so happen to see him walking up to his flat with a different girl almost every week.”

“He probably has lots of female friends,” she told him. “That’s perfectly normal. In fact, I was a bit of a ‘hag’ myself in my youth.”

“You’re still a hag, Helen.”

“Careful, Stanley, or you’ll charm the pants off me.”

***

“Welcome to my humble abode,” Finn said as he opened the door to his flat, letting a young blonde woman enter behind him.

“Your what?” she asked.

“Uh, my flat,” he clarified.

“Oh.” She smiled and nodded. “It’s really nice,” she added as she looked around.

“If you like this room then you should see mine,” he said in his cheesy pickup voice.

“Okay.”

He raised his eyebrows in surprise. “Really?”

“I do like this room.”

“Well, then, follow me.”

***

Rae was annoyed that Finn never texted to let her and Chloe know it was okay for them to return to the flat, so eventually they decided to return anyway. They had only agreed to stay out for a couple of hours, so if he wasn’t done, it was his own fault. How much time could he possibly need?

When they got in, they noticed that the door to his room was shut.

“I think he’s asleep,” said Rae.

“He could be getting some hanky-panky,” said Chloe with a chuckle.

“You know how awfully loud his mattress is,” Rae pointed out. “We can hear every time he rolls over. There’s nothing going on in there.”

“So he just completely forgot about us and went to sleep, then?”

“Seems like it.”

“Typical.”

***

Rae woke up the next morning when she heard a noise coming from the kitchen. She figured it must have been Finn, so she got up to go and give him a piece of her mind about last night.

When she got to the kitchen, however, she was surprised to see that he wasn’t alone. A young blonde woman was sitting at the table with him, eating pancakes.

“Rae!” he said, apparently startled to see her standing there. “I thought you’d still be sleeping…” He looked back and forth between the two girls in the room, trying to figure out how to explain this.

“Who is she?” the blonde one asked him impatiently.

“Uh, this is, uh, Rae,” he began. “She’s, um, she’s my sister. She’s just visiting for a few days. Isn’t that right?”

“Sure,” said Rae.

“Your… sister?” the other woman said slowly.

“Well,” he added to her, “I know you said you had a busy day today, so I won’t keep you any longer. Here, I’ll walk you out.”

***

“Why that son of a…” the landlord grumbled into the curtains of the front window.

“What is it now, Stanley?” his wife responded, bored.

“That gay fella—”

“Finn.”

“—is leaving with the same girl I saw him bring up there last night!”

“So?”

“So? Why was she there all night?” he said in a huff. “What were they doing?”

“It was probably just a sleepover, Stanley.”

“What, you mean like a _girls’_ night in?”

His wife rolled her eyes. “Yeah, something like that.”

“Well, all right, then,” he said. “I suppose it’s better than him bring guys home. At least with girls up there, I know there won’t be any funny business.”

“Heaven forbid.”

***

“Hi,” Finn said as he leaned against the bar in the pub. “What’s your name?”

“I’m working,” said the woman behind the bar, who was new as far as Finn could tell.

“Hi, Working, I’m Finn,” he said.

“I think your girlfriend is trying to get your attention,” she replied.

“Heh. I don’t have a girl—” He stopped when he turned around and noticed the young blonde woman from the other night waving at him from across the pub. “—Friend.”

He smiled at her and headed over to greet her, so as not to be rude.

“Finn!” she said excitedly as she rushed towards him and planted a kiss on his lips.

“Hey, what are you doing here?” he asked, trying not to sound annoyed while she hugged him.

“You mentioned that you like coming here, so I thought I would check it out,” she said.

“That’s great, really, but—”

“Hello, Finn.”

Finn turned again at the sound of his name and saw his landlady approaching. He quickly shoved the young blonde woman aside before responding, “Hello, Mrs. Roper. How are you this evening?”

“I’m just fine, dear,” she said, smiling. “Who’s your friend?”

“Hmm? Oh, her? She’s, uh, she’s my sister!” he said. “Anna.”

“Anita,” the girl corrected him.

“Right, Anita. I just call her Anna for short. She’s visiting from out of town.”

“I saw you two kissing,” said the landlady.

“We’re just, uh, close.”

“It’s okay, Finn. I know.”

“You know what?” he asked nervously.

“I know your secret. I’ve known for a while.”

“Please, you’re not going to tell—”

“My husband? Of course not,” she said. “What you do is your own business, as far as I’m concerned.”

“Thank you, Mrs. Roper, I mean it,” he said. “If there’s anything I can ever do for you, anything at all, let me know.”

“Oh, I’m sure there’s plenty a young man like you could do for me, but don’t worry about it. You’re secret’s safe with me.”

***

“That must’ve been awkward, running into her like that,” Archie said as he sat on a cushion on the floor of the lounge.

Finn laughed. “Which one?”

“The landlady, I mean.”

“Oh, yeah, but it turns out she’s cool with everything,” he said. “The blonde, on the other hand. I must’ve given her an STD or something.”

“Ew, Finn! What?” said Chloe.

“I mean, being obsessed with someone is a disease, right?”

“You think she’s obsessed with you?” Rae scoffed.

“She keeps showing up wherever I am!” said Finn.

“She showed up one time at a place you recommended to her,” she pointed out.

“But she’s acting like she’s my girlfriend.”

“So?” said Chloe.

“I don’t do girlfriends,” he said.

“Look, mate,” said Chop. “If you don’t like her, tell her to piss off.”

“I don’t want to hurt her feelings. Besides, I like to stay friendly with girls in case…”

“In case you make your way through all of them and want to go back around?” Rae asked.

“Bingo,” Finn replied with a wink. “Oh, hey!” he added when the music changed. “I love this song!”

He went to turn up the volume on their sound system. “Somebody dance with me.” He looked at the girls in the room expectantly.

Chop put his arm around Izzy to shield her, while Rae and Chloe made “pfft!” sounds.

“Fine, then. Arch? Get up,” Finn said, tugging on Archie’s arm. “I know you love this song, too, let’s go.”

“Ow, ow, ow!” Archie said as Finn was literally twisting his arm to make him stand. “Jesus, you don’t need to grind up on me.”

“There are ladies watching,” said Finn. “I need to show off my moves.”

“You don’t have any moves.”

“It would be better if you’d stop trying to squirm away from me.”

“I don’t want to dance with you—”

Finn squeezed Archie tighter all of a sudden as soon as he realized that the landlord and his wife had just walked in. “He’s such a tease,” he said to them. “Isn’t that right, Muffin?” he added before planting a kiss on Archie’s cheek.

The landlord looked less than amused. “I thought I said no parties.”

“This isn’t a party,” said Finn.

“The music is so loud you didn’t even hear us knocking on the door!”

“Sorry, it’s just, this song is so good, you know?”

“It sounds like noise to me.”

“That’s because you have no sense of rhythm, Stanley,” said the landlady. She turned to the others and added, “He really doesn’t.”

“That’s enough out of you, Helen,” said the landlord. “As for you,” he returned his attention to Finn, “I don’t want to hear any more music, and I don’t want to see any more of… this.” He waved his hand in the direction of Finn and Archie.

Finn cocked his head and slipped his arm around Archie’s shoulder. “You’re not… _homophobic_ , are you, Mr. Roper?”

The landlord looked nervous. “No, no, of course not, I just— I…”

“What he means to say,” the landlady stepped in, placing a hand on his arm to reign him in, “is you kids have fun, just try to keep it down.”

“We will,” Rae told them as she got up to turn down the volume of the music. “Don’t worry.”

“All right, enough,” Archie said, pushing Finn off of him once the landlord and his wife were gone.

“You know, for a gay man, you’re surprisingly not as in love with me as I’d expect,” said Finn.

“What, are you God’s gift to straight women and gay men, Finn?” said Rae.

“Don’t forget bisexuals of any gender.”

“Of course.”

***

“Got any big plans tonight?” Finn asked Rae.

She looked up from her book as he sat down on the opposite end of the sofa, putting his legs in the space between them. “It’s Tuesday,” she said.

“Yeah. So?”

“Who has big plans on a Tuesday?”

“Seems to me like you never have big plans,” he said, nudging her with his foot.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I’m just saying you never go out.”

“I go out!” she insisted. “I went out last night!”

“I don’t mean going to the pub with us,” he said. “When was the last time you had a date?”

“I don’t know… Recently…”

He nudged her again.

“Okay, like a month ago! Happy?”

“Are you?”

“Yes,” she grumbled.

“Really?”

She slammed her book onto the coffee table and got up. “I’m not like you, all right?” she said as she paced around the room angrily. “I can’t just go from person to person like that, mostly because there aren’t that many people who are interested.”

“What makes you think that people aren’t interested?” he said, getting up and following her.

“Come on,” she said. “Look at me.”

“I am.”

“I’m not exactly Chloe, am I?”

“What does that mean?” he asked.

“I’m not thin and pretty and—”

“Rae, what are you talking about?” He grabbed her arm to stop her from pacing and pulled her in close. Tucking her hair behind her ear, he added, “You’re beautiful.”

“What?”

“It’s true. How could anyone not be interested?”

“Well, thanks, but—”

“I mean it.”

She looked him in the eye; he appeared to be sincere. “Thanks…”

***

“There’s that blonde woman again,” said the landlord, gawking out the front window. “Finn’s friend. What’s she doing here on a Tuesday night, though?”

“That’s his sister, Stanley,” said his wife. “She’s visiting from out of town for a few days.”

“His sister? Oh,” he said. “How do you know this?”

“I ran into them down at the pub the other day and he introduced me,” she said. “Her name’s Anita, I think. Or Anna. They weren’t too clear about that.”

“Is she staying with them?” he asked. “Because they’re supposed to tell me if there’s more than three people staying in that flat, for safety reasons.”

“I’m not sure, Stanley. Why don’t you chase her down and ask her?” she said sarcastically.

“I can’t do that. She’ll already be up at the flat by now.”

***

“Finn?”

Finn stopped what he was doing and looked towards the front door, where his self-proclaimed girlfriend was staring at him in disbelief. “Anna!” he said.

“Anita!”

“Right, Anita, sorry, but this isn’t what it looks like!”

“Really? Because it looks like you were kissing your sister!” she said.

“Uh, half-sister,” he said, as if that made things any better.

“I’m not his sister,” said Rae. “I’m his flatmate.”

“That still doesn’t explain why you were kissing him,” said Anita, nostrils flaring.

“First of all, he kissed me,” Rae explained.

“Not helping!” said Finn.

“And second of all, he’s not your boyfriend,” she continued.

“Finn?” Anita said with watery eyes. “Is this true?”

“Uh, well, you see, the thing is—” Finn began before Rae elbowed him in the ribs. “Agh! Yes! It’s true.”

“But… but… But you said you wanted to be with me forever,” she said.

“I don’t think those were my exact words.”

“You said I was welcome to come here any time, that I didn’t even have to knock.”

“Well…”

“Finn!” said Rae. “Why would you tell her that?”

“Hey, I never said she didn’t have to knock,” he replied defensively.

“But this is what you do, isn’t it?” she said. “You lead people on and make them think they mean more to you than they actually do.”

“Rae, come on,” he said as she stormed off in the direction of her room.

“What about me?” said Anita. “Don’t you care what I think about all of this?”

“Honestly? No, not really.”

She looked appalled by that answer and turned to leave immediately. Finn didn’t even try and stop her; he had bigger concerns.

He knocked on the door to Rae and Chloe’s room. “Rae? Talk to me, please.”

She didn’t answer, so he opened the door.

“What did I tell you about knocking before you come in here?” she said.

“I did knock.”

“Yeah, well, I didn’t say you could come in.”

“Are you angry at me?” he asked.

“Why would I be angry at you?”

“I don’t know, but you seem angry.”

“I’m not angry, I’m just… Why did you kiss me?”

“Oh,” he said, looking away guiltily. “I did it because I wanted to.”

“That’s what you do,” she said. “You see whatever you want and you just take it, no matter what it does to anyone else.”

“I didn’t think it would upset you…”

“I’m not upset!” she snapped. “But I don’t want that. I don’t want you to kiss me, like I’m one of your girls on rotation.”

“Sorry, I won’t do it again,” he said.

They heard the front door open as Chloe got home from work, and she came into the room, surprised to find both Rae and Finn in there.

“What’s going on?” she asked.

“Nothing,” Rae said quickly. “Finn’s just being obnoxious.”

“What else is new?” said Chloe, setting her bag on her bed.

“Hey, come on, I’m not that bad,” said Finn.

“Well, get out of here! I have to change.”

He looked like he wanted to say something, but he just left instead.

“So,” she said to Rae once Finn was gone. “Did he do something in particular to annoy you this evening, or was he just being himself?”

Rae wasn’t sure if she should tell Chloe what happened, even though they no longer had their pact, but she decided honesty was best. “I kissed him,” she said, wrapping her duvet around herself.

“You kissed him?” said Chloe.

“Well, he kissed me, I guess.”

“So? He’s always kissing us.”

“But this was like a proper kiss,” Rae explained. “He brushed back my hair and told me I was beautiful and then…”

“Kissed you?”

She nodded. “And it made me feel so…”

“Repulsed?”

She shook her head as though she were ashamed.

“Oh my god, Rae!” said Chloe. “Do you fancy him?”

“No!” Rae replied quickly. “I mean… I don’t know… I’ve never given it much thought. He’s just Finn; he’s a pain in the ass.”

“You know he likes you, too, right?”

“What? No, he doesn’t. Why would you say that?”

“He’s always flirting with you.”

“He’d flirt with a lamp-post if it had breasts,” said Rae.

“It’d be a funny-looking lamp-post, though.”

“Not the point. His flirting means nothing.”

“Why did he proper kiss you, then?” Chloe asked, like it proved her point.

“I dunno… He said he wanted to.”

“See?”

“That means nothing, too. He’d kiss a lamp-post if—”

“Yeah, I got it. But I still say you’re wrong,” she said. “I think there’s something there between you two.”

“Let’s say, for the sake of argument, that he did like me that way,” said Rae. “All that would do is make me one of his Saturday night girls. I’d have a go and then it’s back to the end of the line.”

“Like he’s an amusement park ride?”

“You know what I mean.”

“You could be wrong about him,” said Chloe. “He cares about you; he wouldn’t treat you like that.”

“You think?”

***

Rae didn’t see Finn until after work the next night, though she was trying to avoid him for longer than that. She wasn’t ready to tell him how she felt yet, even though she was pretty certain now that she felt something.

When he looked up at her and smiled as she entered the lounge where he was playing a video game, she was even more certain.

“What are you playing?” she asked as she sat down on the other end of the sofa after he moved his legs for her.

“ _Dark Souls III_ ,” he said. “I’m not very good, though. I keep dying.”

She watched him play for a couple of minutes before he died again.

He paused before reloading his last save. “Can I just say I’m sorry for last night?” he said, still staring at the television screen.

“It’s all right,” she replied, without looking at him either.

“I just, I don’t want you to think that I think of you as one of my ‘girls on rotation,’ as you put it. Because it’s not like that.”

“Okay…”

“I like you, Rae,” he said.

She held her breath for a moment, surprised by his confession. She opened her mouth to respond—

“You’re a good friend,” he added. “And I don’t want to complicate that or make you uncomfortable.”

“I see…” she finally managed to say, though she was a little crushed.

“I know I’m a touchy-feely kind of guy, and I can be a bit too hands-on, so to speak, but I’ll try to avoid that around you from now on.”

“Oh,” she said. “Good. I’m glad we cleared things up.”

“I’d give you a hug, but that might be construed as touchy-feely.”

“Heh. Yes. Well. I’m just going to…” She got up and headed to her room without another word.

One step forward, three steps back.

***

“Why is Rae hiding in our room again?” Chloe asked when she got home.

“I have no idea,” Finn said as he got killed once again.

She leaned against the back of the couch as she watched him play his game. “I thought she was going to talk to you.”

“I did talk to her,” he said. “I apologized and told her I wouldn’t do anything like it again.”

“You what?” Chloe sounded appalled.

“What’s wrong now?”

“You know that Rae has a huge crush on you, right?” she said.

“What? No way,” he replied.

“It’s true.”

“She’s always admonishing me for stuff; she thinks I’m annoying.”

“That’s because she likes you and you’re too thick to realize it,” said Chloe, smacking him on the back of the head.

“Ow! What was that for?” he said, rubbing his injury.

“The reason she got upset when you kissed her is because she thinks you’ll kiss anything that moves,” she explained. “She even said you’d kiss a lamp-post if it had breasts.”

“A lamp-post with breasts?”

“Never mind that; the point is that she doesn’t want to be just another one of the girls that you kiss and then forget in the morning.”

“I would never do that to her…” he said.

“That’s what I told her.”

“I don’t want to lead her on, though.”

“What are you talking about?” said Chloe. “I thought you liked her.”

“Yeah, sure, but I’m not ready to settle down with just one person yet, and she doesn’t strike me as much of the casual type.”

“Are you serious right now?”

“Yes…?” he said slowly.

“Rae is wonderful and smart and funny, with a rack that just won’t quit, and you think she won’t be enough for you?”

“Do you spend a lot of time thinking about other girls’ chests, or…?”

She smacked him on the back of the head again.

“Okay, sorry, but I don’t know what you want me to say!” he said.

“Say that you’ll make things right with her. Say that you’ll give her a chance. Say—”

“Fine, I get it. I’ll talk to her.”

***

“I’m sleeping,” Rae said when she heard a knock at the bedroom door, even though she was sitting up in bed with her laptop balanced on her knees.

The door opened a little and Finn’s head popped through the opening. “I don’t believe you,” he said before opening the door further and stepping into the room.

“You’d better not be here to hug me,” she said. “Apparently I can’t handle that.”

“So,” he said, sitting at the foot of her bed. “Chloe told me what’s going on. I didn’t realize how you felt about me—”

“How I what?” She snapped her laptop shut and set it on the bed next to her. “What did she tell you?”

“She sort of… said you have a crush on me…”

“I will kill her, I swear.”

“Look, it’s not a big deal. Now I understand why I upset you so much last night.”

“Oh. Great,” Rae said sarcastically. “I’m glad she was able to help you out like that, at my expense.”

“I like you, too, okay?” he said. “I think you’re awesome, I do, it’s just… You deserve better than me.”

She rolled her eyes. “You don’t need to lie to me. You’re not interested; I get it. Can we please move on from this?”

“It’s not that I’m not interested, I’m just not—”

“Interested.”

“—Ready for such a commitment.”

“If you’ll recall, I didn’t ask for any of this,” she said. “I’m fine with things the way they are. I don’t know why Chloe said anything to you, because I certainly didn’t ask her to, and I don’t even want—”

“Okay, okay,” he said with a laugh, placing a hand on her knee. “I get your point. Forget I said anything, and we’ll just go on how we were.”

“Thank you.”

“So you’ll stop avoiding me?”

“I wasn’t avoiding you.”

He gave her a knowing look.

“All right, I’ll stop avoiding you.”

He smiled as he stood up. “Come watch me die a few more times before dinner.”

She smiled back. “I’d like that.”


End file.
